Sire, is it finished yet?

As you may have read recently, the castle is undergoing renovation. I thought I might share these magical photos with you.

Castle Kitchen

 

Castle bathroom

Diorama by The King.

Royal Parking Only

Spotted this morning across the drawbridge.

 

Quite appropriate.

It’s Good to be The (only) King

I’m not sure what steps King Willy should take about this.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/northern_ireland/8148388.stm

What do you think he should do?

yes Virginia, he knows everything

Every so often, like all of us who would like to earn money without actually, um, working, I go to Wikipedia and click “random article” to waste time before I start a big client project.

It is at least 6 months since I last did it – this is the link I got five minutes ago:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Il_re

What are the chances?

Still Life of 18 year old dog and Castle Renovation

Midnight – arrive home from next door neighbors across the moat
2am get up and clean incontinent dog covered with wee
4am see above
6am see above
6.05am mop floor
6.15am coffee
6.20am climb under castle turn on hot water
6.25am carry dog into garden through construction zone stand next to her for poo. nothing
6.30am carry dead weight dog back into castle over bricks and concrete
7.00am read news, few mins peace, dog farting
7.30am see 2am
7.35am see 6.05am
8.00am wash dog bed
8.30am see 2am
9.00am attempt to wake The King. failed
9.30am see 2am
10.00am wash dog in bath, use up all hot water
10.15am cold shower
11am struggle through construction site to clothes line
11.15am wake The King. success
11.30am see 2am
12 noon Bottle Shop

Inkheart

Through internet caverns measureless to man, I happened upon the Stabilo Boss Flirt School.

Yes, you read it right, that is the brand of the fluoro highlighter on your desk.

In shock and forgetting that The King could order my beheading, I logged in and flirted, using their multiple choice presets. None of the guys I flirted with wanted to buy me a drink.

A) I guess I’ll keep my head

B) What was I doing there when I could have been, oh, cleaning the royal toilet?

and

C) Stabilo Boss, wtf, it’s a marker company… maybe I had absinthe with my lunch and I’m hallucinating.

A sobering question

The King and I hit the Cross last night. Not somewhere I would normally go, though The King is there all too often checking on his subjects.

But College Girl had found a Bohemian Café with an absinthe cocktail menu.

We had several B52s (The King had rifled the Royal Treasury) and lots of Green Fairy Devils. And the Green Fairy Devils were flamed, so that the alcohol level (note menu above) was minimised. Consequently, when we rolled out of there after four hours, we were relatively sober.

So my question is: was it worth the travesty of flaming the absinthe so that we weren’t incapacitated, or did we completely miss the point of the evening?

Astral lunching

You may recall that my sister invited PsychoMother out for lunch on her birthday, and received this perplexing reply: “That would be lovely. Last year was so embarrassing.”

The big day was yesterday, and I’m relieved to report that PM was sweet, friendly and (for her) normal.

However, my sister flew overseas the day before the lunch.

What will PM say next year?

lolcats rool

The heading on an article in the local rag:

“Google Books – all your novels are belong to us?”

I wonder what Stephen Conroy would make of that?

Macca’s Ennui

Unwillingly pulled up at the McDonald’s ‘drive thru’ window by request of The King, the serving attendant asks me if I “would like a beverage with that.” I open my mouth with the usual bright, innocent reply, “I’m not sure, what drinks do you have, and what sizes do they each come in, and how much do they each cost?” when suddenly it all seems too hard. “No, thank you,” I murmer, defeated.

Am I getting old and jaded?

This crown is heavier than I thought.